Speaking the love language

Let’s face it: Men and women speak completely different languages. One speaks a language of sudden phrases that are meant to cause the opposite sex to over-think every action a thousand times, while the other tends to say things they don’t mean anything in the pursuit of an all-important prize, just out of reach.
But both are trying to get their point across while never saying what they are really feeling and what they really want. And this is for the simple reason that if they did, both parties would run for the hills.
Here’s the problem in a nutshell: Men say things they don’t mean while women mean things they don’t say. You can’t really blame them. Women don’t want to seem overbearing while men say those three ever-important words to women usually before, after or during a certain activity.
It’s not that we females want to lie or mislead, but we simply assume both teams are playing the same game. In reality, no one knows the rules.
So instead, women embellish – OK, lie. We say things we don’t mean and cause both sexes to go through days, weeks, even months, trying to figure out what went wrong in those infamous post-argument hours.
Case in point. I’m sitting at a Starbucks the other day, waiting on my chai tea latte, when I hear a couple at the table next to me having an argument. The problem: Only the girl at that very table and myself were aware that they were having an argument. The guy in question seemed to be totally clueless to the matter.
Here’s how the argument went down.
The guy in question had been caught in a bold faced lie about his activities the night before and when confronted by his girlfriend, he said something to this extent: “You’re not upset, are you?”
His girlfriend replied, “No, why I would be upset?” After which the female in question took one more sip of her coffee and gave him a rather dirty look before walking out of the shop in a huff. The guy, of course, scratched his head before following after her, only to realize a little too late that she had the car keys.
You can’t really blame them, but men are just oblivious to what women are really saying. Take, for example, when a woman says “Nothing” to the question, “What did I do that was so wrong?” My dear fellows, you did everything wrong.
“Nothing” means that you didn’t think, you didn’t consider our feelings, you didn’t ask for input or simply, you did nothing at all.
Now boys, while women are guilty of occasionally not saying what they want or what is really bothering them, you are guilty of saying just the right thing for the wrong reasons.
Here’s a piece of advice to last you a lifetime: Women take things very seriously, so when you say words like love, like, care, future and marry, mean them when you say them or don’t bother saying anything at all.
And while some will question why I’ve revealed these little secrets to the world, the answer is simple. Perhaps if men were a bit more aware of what women wanted and women were aware of what men wanted, then, well, the world would be a much more peaceful place.